Empathy--what's it made of?

As a coach I am paid to be empathetic but far too often I fail to be empathetic in my personal life.  However, my desire is to really listen to and understand others.  If you look at EMPATHY you will see it contains EMPTY and AH. 

To become empathetic one needs to be EMPTY of ME.  In other words, create a space in our agendas, minds and emotions for another person.  Take time to listen without planning what you are going to say next.  Withhold all judgment and criticism for a few minutes.  Allow the other person to complete their thoughts and expression of what they are experiencing.  Be completely there for THEM.

As you listen you will begin to grasp the scope of emotions they are feeling and come to understand the thinking behind what they have expressed.  When you are fully engaged with empathy you will automatically respond with AH......followed by a phrase which confirms we have fully grasped their situation and emotions, "AH, now I understand why you....."

Empathy opens doors for authenticity and understanding leading to close, healthy relationships.  Of course, this is of tremendous value within families but it is also of value in the workplace where assumptions and misunderstandings prevail.

Follow these steps in several conversations this next week and let me know what happens.